‘No, you’re crazy,’ I said. 

At the summer camp we had organised in Egypt, the children used this sentence to joke with each other. They would call me crazy, I would give the best retort possible; ‘No, you are.’ And they would laugh and keep it going until they switched to another word. 

Had I been joking with a child in Egypt, it would have been an appropriate response. As the words were leaving my mouth, I knew it was not the right retort. Fresh from another month in Egypt, I spoke these words to a resident in an institute caring for people with mental health issues. 

I was so shocked I practically froze.

She just grinned, stuck out her tongue and turned around to continue dancing. 

We had been making peace with each other after I had caused her to cry. She wanted to play some Lebanese songs. I had accepted the change but explained that it would play after another song in the queue. She nodded, (in agreement, I thought),  turned around and burst out crying. 

A local who had accompanied us helped me to repair the damage I had caused. We shook hands, she smiled, and gestured that I’m crazy. My retort was automatic.

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While my words were definitely not ideal, a part of me was glad I said them. Each person we encounter is different. The relationships we build with them are unique. We should be careful with our words and how we use them, but true to our situation. In answering her jest with another one, I was treating her with respect. 

Friends allow us to make mistakes and accept us regardless. But true friends also correct us, gently, and with the intent to help us grow, when we make mistakes. Often, our friends correct us without having to say anything. A true friendship pushes us to become better versions of ourselves and makes us more aware of our flaws, and brings to attention our strengths. 

The people we spend our time with are the people we will be like. Traits and achievements tend to rub off, whether they are good or bad. It is important to reflect upon what traits the people we spend time with have, how their character holds up in the face of adversity. 

It is also important to reflect upon how our own character is affecting those around us. Are we a positive example in the relationships we are a part of? A relationship is lived by two, and each of the two can either support or bring down the other. Accepting that we can be a positive and negative influence on others is a great step in getting us to be the best we can be.